Reminiscing 2005

Looking back at the past 1 year i can say that 2005 has been a pretty good year. I have found the love of my life, i have a stable job, a bunch of friends i can rely on, i had a great year end holiday and managed learn to become a wee bit more responsible throughout the year. There have been no major turnarounds or events this year but things are turning out for the better slowly but surely. as someone dear to me told me, keep being persistant and patient. things will slowly happen. in the short term i guess its hard to see that but when you look in the long run and at the big picture you really see the difference.

however, this doesnt mean i'm happy where i am. content, yes. happy ? no. theres alot ( i mean ALOT ) of room for improvement. i still need to quit slacking so much and stay focused. the big bucks have yet to start rolling in and i sure as hell dont wanna spend the rest of my life in this position. i've been thinking of quitting smoking for god knows how long and i still haven't really put my heart into it. i still cant get up early as often as i would like. i have yet to go to start working out and burning the flab that's building up on me. i've been telling myself to continue my studies and so far i'm still procrastinating. ahhh ... so many things to do. i could put all of these things into a new years resolution but then again i think to myself,

"shit, i dont need a new years resolution do this shit. its supposed to be on my personal 'to do' list all the time. i need to keep on going forward, constantly improve and be the best that i can. if not better. that should be my goal in life. and so it will be."

i'm hoping that good things will come in 2006. not without lots of hard work of course. i find that emotionally i'm ready to take my relationship with Shirin to the next level. financially i'm not though. so hopefully 2006 will bring about a change in my financial situation so that i pay proceed with the biggest leap in any relationship. MARRIAGE. yup, you heard me right. Kenneth is thinking about marriage. i may be 25 next year but i feel the person is right and i am ready to commit. still lots of hurdles to clear though.

well... enough of 2005. bring on 2006. i've taken the lessons learnt in the past year and took them heart, thought about them, dissected and analyzed them and found out what went wrong and where improvements can be made. god damn i'm going to do something about it. enough fooling around. time is running out and i'm sick of being stuck in the pit. its taken me 2 years to get where i am now and i still am not out of the deep black hole i fell into. i've started the long climb and theres no point stopping now. gotta keep goin.

this picture just about sums up my life right now.
calm.
serene.
content.
happy but not as happy as i could be due to the gloomy skies.
the dark clouds in the background signifies that although everything's fine now but theres still a big chance a storm might break and ruin the serenity of this picture. in the back of my head i'm hoping and praying that the clouds wont burst and that the storm will pass.
same thing goes in my life. things are going well but its not without its worries. they're there, at the back of my head, gnawing away.

that's all for now. i've got some work to do.
will post more later.

peace out people.
i wish you all a great end to 2005
and to even better beginning in 2006.